Monday, July 5, 2010

Dave the Punk Rock Cat's Big Adventure Page 21

I swear to God, every little thing distracted me from getting this page done, but I frikkin' did it. It's funny how a guy like me can never learn from the past. Every summer, i always say to myself "THIS summer, I am gonna get MORE drawing done, MORE often! I'll have a huge buffer set up, so that when school starts again in the fall, it won't be a huge deal to keep up!" But every year, inevitably, my work ethic goes way, way down in the summer, and I'm overloaded with other projects to take on. I dunno what it is, but my most likely guess is that I can only work on comics while I'm AT school, while being told to do something else ;-)
I am certain that over this coming week, I'll have more than enough time to draw, chances are I'll be shipped off to Denver sometime soon. My Grandmother isn't doing to well, and in true American tradition, I have to go there and.... watch her suffer :(
I'll never understand death, and people's reactions to it. I can accept that my grandmother lives this long and fulfilling life, and now it's over. She suffered long with a horrible sickness in her last years on Earth, and she's about to be released from it. If you believe in heaven, or an afterlife of some kind, she's about to go there. By all logic, we, her relatives, should be rejoicing. Her pain is finally over, she's free now. But somehow, this feeling translates into a lot of tears, a lot of weeping, huddling together and mourning. Yes, this is a loss for us, but logically thinking, it's nothing but a gain for her. What keeps us reveling in our own pain and sense of loss, and keeps us from feeling relief that she's passed? That she's no longer suffering with her sickness in this world? I am of two minds on this subject, because I feel both right now, pretty intensely. I wish it could learn to channel out this pain, and focus my mind on being glad that my grandmother, whom I grew up with and loved very dearly all my life will soon exist in a world without pain. I don't know, i'm not there yet, and neither is the rest f my family, and without a doubt I'll be sharing in the huddling and the sobbing, and we'll all have a brand new piece of pain to hold onto for awhile. I am not looking forward to this trip, i am not looking forward to seeing what this does to the rest of my family and I'm not looking forward to bringing this home with me.
Oh well, i am only going to have to focus on making the rest of ym summer as fun as possible, and really, actually try to get more art done.

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